I 100% planned I would breastfeed. I read the books (lots of books). I bought the travel pump to take to work, I bought the accessories, I got the clothes, set up my nursing spot, I was ready. Then I had the baby.
Bennett and my nursing journey didn’t start as planned. We didn’t get to start during that magic first hour due to a nurse’s advice to “wait until he’s really ready.” Then, we were separated a lot because of severe jaundice treatment. More here.
I saw multiple board certified lactation specialists. Five to be exact. They did assessments and weight tests to determine I have low supply. I’m producing about half of what my baby needs. That was heartbreaking. However, I knew I wanted to give my son everything I had.
I breastfeed my baby as often as he wants (on-demand) which is usually every 1.5 hours. During the day for as long as he wants. During the night, I cut him off at 20 minutes so I can get some sleep. (Once he started sleeping a bit longer, I stopped cutting him off and let him eat.) After nursing, I supplement with formula. At first this was with a syringe to avoid nipple confusion (really bottle preference).
Then, we used comotomo bottles.
The first month was hard, really hard. It was also painful.
Typically it was only painful when he first latched on because we worked hard on getting a good latch, but it still didn’t feel great. (It did start being easier around 2 months.)
Then there were the challenges:
- Sleepy jaundice baby – I’d have to wake him constantly while nursing
- Fussy – he gets frustrated during letdown and then when I run out of milk so he whips his head around – again, painful
- Not enough milk – this meant pumping and herbs and lactation specialists for me
- Learning to latch – standard challenge for all breastfeeding mommies and babies
To try to increase my supply, the lactation specialists prescribed I:
- Feed on-demand around the clock
- Feed both sides each time
- Take fenugreek and brewers yeast
- Pump after every feeding for 20 minutes
- Supplement with formula as needed
This plan was literally sucking the life out of me. So, after a month, my husband and I modified it:
- Feed on-demand around the clock but try to keep night feedings under 30 minutes
- Feed on both sides
- Take fenugreek and brewers yeast
- Pump after daytime feedings for 10-20 minutes
- Supplement with formula
After a month, the lactation specialist confirmed I was producing more but my baby’s appetite increased too, so, I was still at about half what he needed. She told me to keep with the plan.
To stay alive, at around two months, I started the following:
- Feed on-demand around the clock but try to keep night feedings under 30 minutes. If I had someone here to help, I would nap after nursing for up to 3 hours and let them give him a bottle of formula while I slept
- Feed on both sides
- Take fenugreek and brewers yeast
- Pump if my baby had not eaten in an hour and was sleeping soundly – this was always a gamble
- Supplement with formula
If I had listened to the books, the online forums, and the breastfeeding groups, I would have just breastfed on-demand as much as my baby wanted. That should have increased my milk and given him everything he needed. That is all true if my body worked properly. However, I have low supply. So, I would have starved my baby.
Not being able to exclusively breastfeed like I planned killed me. However, I know I’m doing what is best for my baby. Getting support from lactation consultations at the beginning is key for a good latch and to identify any problems early on. If you do have low-supply, morn the loss of your breastfeeding dream, but do what is best for you, your baby, and your family.
Fed is best.
